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More about “sexual polarities”… (9 questions)

Consider your sexual polarities

Question:

kinkawarecoach_elizabeth-de-bold-com-ballet-balance
I’ve talked about the sexual polarities before (see here*). People liked a little more explanation with this so: this time a post with a little bit more text for you to be able to get a better feel for the options in play.

Of course these are just very crude polarities, for every axis of BDSM has it’s own paradoxical aspects. I’d love to submit to you and be degraded by you but I’d totally want to be respected in doing so. I’d like to smack you and perhaps even see you cry because I really care for you and your masochism. I really want to be shackled and bound so that I won’t have any possibilities to withstand those evil sexual kicks of my partner and I am left really no other choice but enjoying them immensely 🙂
Continue reading More about “sexual polarities”… (9 questions)

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Bondage tips (The Tao of the Rope)

BDSM

Question:

kinkawarecoach_bondage-cvHans, I’d like to start with bondage… Could you give me a hand?
Answer:
Well… apart from giving a hand I’d better give you some safetytips and a series of youtu.be’s so you can start yourself and follow the leads Youtube gives to start surfing. I am not a ‘bondagemaster’ myself but I would like people to play safely so I can give you at least an idea and a direction to surf. And of course these leads are completely arbitrary and if you have tips for great additions: let me know.


My personal bondage tips are (the Tao of the Rope): Continue reading Bondage tips (The Tao of the Rope)

8 okt’16 – Europerve party – 30th birthday

Party

Europerve 30th Birthday

kinkinfo_europerve

Europerve is one of the first real fetish (rubber/latex) parties in the world. It has been quiet for many a year but it is alive and kicking again for the 5rd resurrection in a row.
It is not so much a sex-party -even tho sexyness is all around of course- it is a party for rubber-/latex lovers that like to dress up in layer upon layer upon layer 🙂
Continue reading 8 okt’16 – Europerve party – 30th birthday

Sexual polarities to understand the Kinks of your relationship

Consider your sexual polarities

Question:

kinkawarecoach_elizabeth-de-bold-com-ballet-balance
I’d like to understand the kicks of my partner… / I’d like to come out of the closet to my partner… / I’d like to converse about my kicks…
…but I don’t know where to start.
Answer:
If you see certain aspects of sexuality in their polarity you could use that as a good start for conversations such as the ones mentioned in the ‘question’.
Continue reading Sexual polarities to understand the Kinks of your relationship

8/10/16 – Kink in de Relatie (problems and fun) #BeyondBinary

Beyond the Binary Day 2016 – Kink in Relation (.nl)

west-coaching_beyondthebinary Saturday October 8 from 11:30 to 12:45
St. Anthony Place 1, 6511 TR Nijmegen, Netherlands

A lecture on ‘Kink in Relationships” and what that means for the relationship.
Of course I am speaking with the bias of a coach, so I am seeing more of the problematic situations in my practice. But lets talk about ways to make kink fun (and tackling the difficulties can help there of course) 😉 Continue reading 8/10/16 – Kink in de Relatie (problems and fun) #BeyondBinary

What’s in my oh so Domly first Aid kit? (apart from chocolate)

NurseYes, I would advice anyone that is into a bit of heavier play to have a redcross (or lighter version) of first aid knowledge. No really, how hard is that and it could save lives.
Also you could (next to this lighthearted version) have a serious look at a home-family First Aid-kit


Now what could ( I am not saying “should” ’cause I know your allergic reactions to that word) be in your private Kit? Continue reading What’s in my oh so Domly first Aid kit? (apart from chocolate)

Remember to embrace the FLUFF (an acronym when talking about sexual whishes)

General Sexuality

Question:

KinkAwareCoach_SexTalkI am kinda afraid to talk to my lover about the kinky things I find hot. How do I start that conversation about my fetishes? Any ideas?

a question I got on FetBuzz*

Answer:
Embrace the F.L.U.F.F.!… And don’t even try to do this without blushing. It will be awkward and the golden rule in these situations is:

Embrace your awkwardness!

That is hard (believe me, I know!), but with practice comes virtue. And of course that doesn’t do you much good if you haven’t got that virtue yet… But dare to hope! Go for it! (your seventy year old self will hate you for not trying it!)
Remember: it might even be one of the most liberating things you ever did for yourself.
Continue reading Remember to embrace the FLUFF (an acronym when talking about sexual whishes)

You have any sex – addiction tips? #ABDL

Sexuality

Question

KinkAwareCoach_DiaperSexI have a fetish for diapers and I don not mean to stop liking that stuff, what I experience as a problem is the urge to pleasure myself when I see or think about a diaper. I want my abdl life to be pure, like that of a child’s. Not masturbating fives times a day which leads me into self hate and depression. I want to have the cute cuddly stuff for regression values, not because it makes me feel horny. I start fantasize about my close friends that don’t even know that ABDLs exist. When I see them I remember what I fantasized about them which leads to uncomfortable feelings. Can you help me to stop being such a pervert? Continue reading You have any sex – addiction tips? #ABDL

Products / Produkte

I offer private meetings (Amsterdam based), phone-calls, skyping & hangouts, emails, workshops and (un)conferences.

private meetings

When you’re in the Amsterdam area we can meet for a talk.
-individual talks that last up to 75 minutes:

€95,= / 75mins.

-Relationship Coaching with 2, 3 or 4 people:

€115,= / 75mins.

phone-calls & skyping

Are both the same in pricing (tho Skyping -Hangout- often is more personal and tends to take up a bit more time)

€30,= / 30 mins.

emails

Of course reading and writing both take time

€30,= / 30 mins.

workshops

We’ve organized both workshops for both laymen and professionals (learning te be Kink Aware Professional).

Prices may differ

(un)conferences

We’ve organized several unconferences now and they’ve always done the trick in motivating people to take an active stance toward informing ones self.

Prices may differ

My boyfriend lets me date another… #panic!

MyHeartIsStrongerQuestion: My boyfriend said that she was happy for me that I can experiment with my submissive feelings. We tried and he’s not into BDSM and we agreed that I am allowed to “find my master”… no limits… He says he is fine with that and I really really want to believe him, but it is almost unbelievable to me!
Answer: Now that is what we call “Compersion” (a.k.a. “Frubble”) and it is a scary feeling if you haven’t experienced it much in your life. Compersive feelings are positive loving feelings one can feel towards a partner (and perhaps even toward the “partner’s partner”) Continue reading My boyfriend lets me date another… #panic!