The power of the submissive, the need of the Dom(me)

BDSM Question: Hans, how come that i can feel so strong after I have been submitting myself to my Dom? I don’t understand the dynamic between me, a victim of his Lust. So why do I feel strong instead of weak? What is my strength as a victim? Answer: ‘Victims’ actually have a lot ofContinue reading “The power of the submissive, the need of the Dom(me)”

A present for a bondage lover #NoMassacrePlease

BDSM Question: I would really like to buy a nice “safety knife” for the birthday of a friend who is crazy about bondage. You know to cut ropes if needed… Do you also have a tip for me what to look for? Answer: In my opinion, you really find beautiful knives with money in (expensive)Continue reading “A present for a bondage lover #NoMassacrePlease”

But… What about love in BDSM?

BDSM If we talk about a “triangle of love” in the BDSM-scene, most people think of a threesome, or of bondage-patterns over naked skin. Understandable but it kinda adds to the view that “those BDSM-kinda-people are not really capable of love” (Yes I know some relationship therapists still have this outdated view, even tho thereContinue reading “But… What about love in BDSM?”

I want to have my own slavegirl… what are my rights?

BDSM Question: on Being a Dom(me) Hi Hans, I want a slavegirl who does what I say. How do I find a woman to submit to my every whim? And I want to give her to friends to fuck and shit. But what if she does not want to what I want, what are myContinue reading “I want to have my own slavegirl… what are my rights?”

Terminal-F.com (who’s your favorite?)

Fetish So if you are just a tiny bit like me you do not really mind to see beautiful women clad in latex and leather and lace. Great chance! In alphabetical order the six European topmodels Kay Morgan, Lotte Groeneweg, MadMoiselle Peachy, Psylocke, Sister Sinister, Starfucked teamed up to create www.Terminal-F.com.

Negotation or agreement (in BDSM or kink-play)

BDSM & Swinging Question: I hear about negotiation all the time. What should I negotiate and what should I get from these negotiations? And how do I prevent us from talking the fun to death? Answer: Personally, I am not too fond of the use of the word “negotiation” in relationships and (BDSM)play situations. ItContinue reading “Negotation or agreement (in BDSM or kink-play)”

Bondage tips (The Tao of the Rope)

BDSM Question: Hans, I’d like to start with bondage… Could you give me a hand? Answer: Well… apart from giving a hand I’d better give you some safetytips and a series of youtu.be’s so you can start yourself and follow the leads Youtube gives to start surfing. I am not a ‘bondagemaster’ myself but IContinue reading “Bondage tips (The Tao of the Rope)”

Sexual polarities to understand the Kinks of your relationship

Consider your sexual polarities Question: I’d like to understand the kicks of my partner… / I’d like to come out of the closet to my partner… / I’d like to converse about my kicks… …but I don’t know where to start. Answer: If you see certain aspects of sexuality in their polarity you could useContinue reading “Sexual polarities to understand the Kinks of your relationship”

What’s in my oh so Domly first Aid kit? (apart from chocolate)

Yes, I would advice anyone that is into a bit of heavier play to have a redcross (or lighter version) of first aid knowledge. No really, how hard is that and it could save lives. Also you could (next to this lighthearted version) have a serious look at a home-family First Aid-kit Now what couldContinue reading “What’s in my oh so Domly first Aid kit? (apart from chocolate)”

Remember to embrace the FLUFF (an acronym when talking about sexual whishes)

General Sexuality Question: I am kinda afraid to talk to my lover about the kinky things I find hot. How do I start that conversation about my fetishes? Any ideas? a question I got on FetBuzz* Answer: Embrace the F.L.U.F.F.!… And don’t even try to do this without blushing. It will be awkward and theContinue reading “Remember to embrace the FLUFF (an acronym when talking about sexual whishes)”